東皇30 邏輯已死,黃天當立 - 布袋戲

By Gary
at 2016-12-16T04:03
at 2016-12-16T04:03
Table of Contents
邏輯已死,黃天當立。
《金光欲糾結之東皇皮影》第三十集隨堂測驗
(每題8.7分,共87分)
1.如何拯救《東皇戰影》?
(A) 他基八啦賴總把西劍流和東劍道都殺光光乾淨清爽
(B) 上官胖信把海境輻射魚殺光後把小師妹關小黑屋關好關滿
(C) 把大俠反鎖在錄音室內鎖好鎖滿唯有三弦歸來之時才可以假釋
(D) 愛靈靈時間靈能爆發直接穿越時空進入下一檔
(E) 以上皆是
2.下列何者在《東皇戰影》三十集中曾經吐血?
(A) 上杉家專門負責失敗與切腹的江憲龍一
(B) 傷疲在身沒休息廢到笑的Q扣
(C) 超玻璃心掉玻璃鞋的北冥異
(D) 觀眾
(E) 以上皆是
3.護樹成為一種流行趨勢,中原明明無政府組織卻非常前衛的存有「保林地」的概念。
開墾有風險,伐木須謹慎,下列何種林中怪獸會使出泰山壓頂的技能?
(A) 卡比獸
(B) 綠野仙蹤的小屋
(C) 奇人密碼的落石
(D) 櫻吹雪
(E) 以上皆是
4.蒙太奇是電影創作的主要敘述手段和表現手段之一,下列何者文字敘述的最有張力、
最有衝突性也最為荒謬?
(A) 三十集剪了六次
(B) 看完三十集絕對會改觀
(C) 發氣功把地球炸掉
(D) 折一片不夠,你有試著折十片嗎?
(E) 以上皆是
5.下列何者替身橋段演得最為拙劣?
(A) 春桃/花子
(B) 霜/望月
(C) 雪山銀燕/雪山野牛
(D) 櫻吹雪/天宮伊織
(E) 以上皆是
6.海境位於無根水域當中,洋流加速系統錯綜複雜,試問從海境皇城移動到海境邊關需
要耗費多少時間?
(A) 未珊瑚的一個move
(B) 北冥縝的一個大軍漫步
(C) 北冥華的一個小奔跑
(D) 夢虯孫的一個輪椅滑移
(E) 以上皆是
7.下列何者是上官胖信最喜歡的事物?
(A) 裝B
(B) 師尊
(C) 失敗的第一步
(D) 失敗的小師妹
(E) 以上皆是
8.下列何者是Q孫和Q扣的共通點?
(A) 藍色
(B) 蠢
(C) 弱
(D) 拖戲
(E) 以上皆是
9.四傷拳為金光鐵粉衛的武功,由於其特點為如果使用者功力不足,反而會造成自身之
內傷,其口訣中有四不談,下列何者為是?
(A) 談邏輯,傷感情
(B) 談劇情,傷智商
(C) 談折片,傷荷包
(D) 談情侶,傷賴總
(E) 以上皆是
http://i.imgur.com/J8u0dqe.jpg
10.戰術是指取得小規模勝利或實現小規模優化的技術。在戰場上,開啟小夥伴的羈絆是
重要的戰術運用,請問下列何者羈絆為是?
(A) 用法術無效,用毒也無效時,同時運使毒和法術,攻擊力增加0.00%
(B) 與夥伴前往解救已重傷人質時,與重傷的人質同時發大招,攻擊力提升0.87%,
增加870%爆擊率
(C) 誘導敵人進入無根水領域時,己方的智力下降120%
(D) 黃立綱出現於東瀛線時,舊角出現爸爸媽媽表哥表姐阿姨嬸嬸未婚妻未婚夫等
親戚別計較機率增加87000%
(E) 以上皆是
殺殺殺,都殺,都可以殺!東皇能否被拯救就全靠賴總了。
東瀛這種無藥可救的線直接通通燒燬斷他魂結斷他鎖鏈斷開一切的牽連比較實在,這
是一個愛靈靈的轉移。
那個出雲啊那個紫啊,西劍流的舊角,變了樣子。
整個東瀛,被賴總閃電擄去。
http://i.imgur.com/85jleNO.jpg
快速釋放鉅子領袖,狷螭狂夕照古峰老老實實地打出來。
海境只需要留下月月孤鳴和珊瑚就可以了,想必未來會有新的源源不絕的海狗家族可
以取輻射魚而代之重新遍佈海境棲地。
胖信麻煩把你家小師妹關好關滿不要放出來害人謝謝。
俏俏和千雪聯手打不贏,俏俏和千雪和狷螭狂聯手瞬間就秒大家到底是甚麼神一般的
戰鬥智慧整個讓人想不通啊。
敢情婷妃、雨相、裨將、狷父都同個人是吧,花二十幾集描寫還可以把要角寫得比疆
朝應三少、應四郎還要沒有特色,也是讓人開了眼界。
小異崩潰拍得不錯,掉鍊子掉鞋子的很可愛,雖然劇情廢到笑。
這集最大的亮點就你他媽Amy呀的嬌喘吧。Amy呀每次和流主講話閨怨氣息都超重,甚
麼你不相信我啦你不重視我啦你對你可愛的軍師我整個很不好欸混蛋每天都在那邊上杉上
杉上杉你心裡到底有沒有我?!
最後只能忌妒的欺負上杉家的小拖油瓶龍一洩憤。
不知道是念錯還是我台語太爛一直把「他山之石可以攻玉」聽成「他山之石可以改玉
」,但這句話是這樣用的嗎?我書讀不多不要騙我!
流主:「你暗中召集聯盟人馬,又是何意?」
御魂:「我是按照主公吩咐,為主公削弱聯盟各家實力啊。」
流主:「若是如此,為何矛頭再三對準西劍流?」
御魂:「他山之石可以攻玉,殲滅西劍流同時造成各家消耗,不正是一石兩鳥嗎?」
這中文到底……算了,反正東瀛線都這個樣。
http://i.imgur.com/ixCWYgY.jpg
龍一整個也超歡樂。
http://i.imgur.com/2bx3amz.jpg
偏遇強將攔路wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
強將wwwwwwww
強wwwwwww將wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
強wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
將wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
小綠藻球切八段依然是小綠藻球,不愧是專職失敗和切腹的龍一君啊。
北條信之介更是粗暴到廢到笑真的爛透了。
http://i.imgur.com/gqlz6HT.jpg
於是乎,看完三十集覺得自己的梗都死了,只剩下上圖這種廢到笑的產出,大概就是
這種崩潰的感覺吧。
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